Letter to My First Born While Expecting My Second

Almost eleven years ago your father and I decided we wanted to start a family.  We knew it wouldn’t be easy as I have PCOS.  That didn’t deter us.  We knew it would happen when the time was right.  After years of trying, it didn’t happen.  We finally decided we needed help. We tried multiple doctors, alternative medicine, and drugs.  Finally, after 8 years of trying, when we had nearly given up, I saw those 2 magical blue lines, announcing your existence.  My pregnancy was not easy but I cherished every moment, knowing it could realistically be the only time I’d ever get to experience pregnancy.

Then you were born.  And you were perfect!  Smart, beautiful, precocious, and stubborn!  We doted on you.  You were the miracle we’d worked so hard for.  We were so proud of this amazing being we’d created.  You clearly preferred your daddy which broke my heart a bit but didn’t lessen the love I felt.

Now as you near your second birthday, we’re unexpectedly expecting a sibling for you.  We were “trying” to get pregnant again but didn’t really believe it would happen again, especially so soon.  You are so excited for the baby growing inside me.  You lift my shirt and kiss baby hello.  You’ve also become increasingly cuddly with me.  You’ve never wanted to cuddle with me unless Daddy wasn’t available.

As we cuddled the other night while Daddy was taking a bath, I was overcome with love and guilt!  I love you so much and I am thoroughly enjoying the snuggles that are now so freely given.  But I feel guilty because just as we’re starting to solidify such a wonderful bond, I’m bringing another baby into the family who is going to steal a good chunk of my time away from you.

In a few short months, you are going from my whole world, to sharing the spotlight with a new love.  I can’t help but wonder if I’ve spent enough time with you.  Were we selfish in having another child so soon?  Will you feel cheated later on?

I can’t answer those questions, but I can make you some promises!  I promise that you will still get alone time with Mommy, Daddy, and even both of us at the same time.  You will always be the miracle who made us a family.  I will always hurt when you are hurting.  I will always smile when you are happy.  And I will never love you less than I did the day you were born.

International Women’s Day: The Epitome of Strong Women

March 8 is International Women’s Day.  It’s a day to celebrate the social, economic, cultural, and political achievements of women.  We at Birth and Beyond would like to celebrate two women who have been incredibly influential to thousands of women worldwide:  Randy Patterson and Debbie Aglietti.

strong women

Randy and Debbie own Northeast Doulas, a full service agency serving the Peekskill, NY area.  They started a diaper drive to help families in need.  The diaper drive has turned into events to assist families all over the country.  In addition to providing services and diapers to families, Randy and Debbie have been instrumental in elevating the doula profession through their certifying body, ProDoula.

In creating ProDoula, they have revolutionized the way doulas are trained.  They created a consistent curriculum for labor, postpartum, business training, placenta, and childbirth education. They teach non-judgmental support, relationship building, and most important, how to run a successful business.

Since being introduced to ProDoula around a year ago, my life has changed dramatically.  My business practices have improved and my client base has grown exponentially.  I am more confident in my personal and professional life.  I have seen the example Randy and Debbie have set and try to make them proud every day.  All of this, without ever meeting either of these ladies in person!  This is just from attending trainings from their representatives and interacting with them and other members of the ProDoula family online.  These women have greatly improved my business, my outlook, and my role in taking care of my family.

These “strangers” feel like a part of my family.  I know that if I ever needed advice, either one of them would chat to me on the phone and assist me to the best of their ability.  To feel that level of support, and to know that I have a whole team in my corner (the whole ProDoula family), makes me feel unstoppable.  These ladies challenge me every day to be better and to never stop growing.  Randy and Debbie are constantly asking us the hard questions and calling us out on our bullshit.  That may sound harsh to some, but it is out of love.  Randy and Debbie honestly want each person in the ProDoula family to be the best they can be.  They empower and inspire me.

So to Randy and Debbie, and all of the people whose lives they’ve touched, directly or indirectly, Happy International Women’s Day!  I hope you all share love and support to all of the amazing women around you today.  Thank you for being such an awesome part of my life and success.

Staffing Announcement

It is with a heavy heart and good wishes that we need to announce that Tammy has decided to leave Birth and Beyond. Her absence will definitely felt. She has accepted a new job that better matches her family’s current needs. We wish her all the best in her future endeavors.